When I’m afraid I start grappling

I do 360 spins holding onto anything that I can

I reach out

When you don’t respond,

I don’t trust you anymore

And if I don’t trust you,

We can’t be friends.

No.

When I’m afraid of something

It’s usually the thing I want the most

Like I’m terrified of committed relationships

Because then, I become vulnerable, open to hurt

I’m afraid of responsibility

But I absolutely love being in charge

Calling the shots

Taking care of others.

I am scared of being away from my family

My comfort zone

Where I could fart and not be judged

Where I could dress half naked and not be sexualized

Where I could be a nerd, a mom and play dress up and adventure with the kids

Where my dog cuddles with me when I’m depressed

Runs off with me when I’m full of energy and high on life!

…

to be continued