What if it’s a lie?

What if they all lied? I mean, we invented this idea of dishonesty to spare each other’s feelings; to protect ourselves and those we care about right? But what if all we do is prolong the notion that the world is a beautiful place and humans are inherently good, and that things get better with time or if you work hard enough you’ll earn the things you want in life, which will make you happy and blah blah blah…

Physically yes, the world is indeed a beautiful place, as a people we have created some beautiful things and done some amazing things but is the world really that amazing? Let’s be candid, let’s check the stats…why is it that happiness is something that we have to fight for? Why is that the good moments are only blips while the bad moments perpetuate? Why is self harm and loathing so instinctive? Umm….Perhaps the grand designer is a sadist 😄 excluding the sexual gratification part.

I think euthanasia should be legal and accepted as a norm. Many countries have constituted that citizens have a right to life, so why shouldn’t they also have the right to die? If we really do get to choose our destinies why can’t one choose to die? What if the very idea of what is right and wrong is so defined to trap us in perpetual torture of guilt and lies.

There is this quote from an unknown author that once gave me hope;

“Everything will be ok in the end. If it’s not ok, it’s not the end. ”

What if the end s/he spoke of was the end end, as in RIP, the end? Because in all honesty; life is generally about stress and stress management. It’s the hallmark of being alive; facing challenges and overcoming them. Doesn’t that inherently tell you that unless/until you are dead then you will essentially never be ok.

Ummm….food for thought.

There is this narrative that suicide is cowardly and selfish and that it doesn’t end your pain it just passes it on to your loved ones.

I have still not grasped how any of the above could be true. Until you have felt the pain that comes with the thought then you will never truly understand. And I suppose that is ok. It’s ok to not understand just don’t be too quick to say it was cowardly. And you know what is selfish, people telling you to hold on for them , to stay alive because they couldn’t bear losing you. Now, as much as your loved ones can try to be there for you, support and comfort you; they cannot live for you and it is living that the suicidal struggles with. The very thought of waking up tomorrow to the same pain + new ones is just overwhelming.

How long must one wait to decide whether it has gotten better with time??


Published by Faith

I am human patiently accepting myself. I am unapologetic about being wild, and untamed. I am always open to new things and I only accept good vibe and positive energies. I love people and life and the world is my playground. I love children, animals and elderly people. I write to express and understand my thoughts, feeling and behaviors. It's self therapy and a visualization tool. I am a selfish loner at times a very sensitive INTJ. I am an aspiring psychological disorders and consumer behavior researcher and practitioner, living with Bipolar 1.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: