As I lay here wrapped in my cozy blanket, I’m warm, I’m satiated, I have my cuddle buddies Joseph and Mary next to me, I have my iPad on my stomach ready to practice my Spanish and “The Secret” on my left which I have been reading for what? 3 months 😄 I’m grateful for my blessings for it cannot be overstated. I am blessed. I am immensely blessed and highly favoured and for that I am eternally grateful.
What if I told you I have lived in this country for over a year and have never paid rent, I have always been warm, well clothed, well fed, and above all, loved and supported. Sometimes I feel undeserving. I wonder how God loves me so. He takes good care of me. He opens all the right doors. He closes all the wrong one. He introduces me to all the right people. He shows me all the right ads. He positions me for success. And you know what? I am always prepared. Always. I don’t really know how. But he just does it. He prepares me for all the opportunities that he sends my way.
I now call myself a moon child. It’s because of this quote I saw somewhere that “even the moon lives in phases”. It has had a profound impact on how I see my “condition”. It helps me understand myself better and to accept that no flower always blooms and no fruit is always in season unless it’s a GMO and we all ought to know that it’s still too early to tell what the side effects of modifying nature are. Well, I am happy. I feel like a success. I took a shower today, I made my bed and I did one thing that is directly aligned with my business goals. I am a success. I am just so blessed.
I have these amazing people in my life. Chica you know yourself. You are the best thing that happened to me since moving to this country. You are kind, you are intelligent, you are patient, very patient, you are genuine, you are honest, you are compassionate, you are empathetic and you are big minded 😆 I don’t know if that’s an actual saying, but as a small town girl you are anything but small minded. You will undoubtedly see the ocean from many pieces of the earth. You’ll dance to new music, and vibe with new people. It’s in your soul. It’s who you are. And that my friend is admirable.
Well, lest I digress any longer. I have accepted that I am a moon child. And that like all naturally occurring things I live in phases. This phase is called dark nights. Dark, lonely, still nights. I love this time of my season but I am not always allowed to revel in it. Life always comes knocking ferociously on my door and I use that adjective deliberately, for to me, it’s like a lion…prowling for me in dark of the forest. I don’t know my way around by sight but I do by faith. I trust my gut, my instincts and I rely on those in my corner to support me. To guide me when I get lost. To reassure me when I’m unsure, to rouse me when I slumber, to remind me when I forget, to understand me when I just can’t understand myself and to be my peace when I need to spend time with me. The dark side of me.
I’m ready. Not because I want to be, but because I must, be. I’ve always told people that I will not marry just for love. It shall be an allegiance. I solemn alliance. Duty to self and humanity.
I pledge to honour my words, I pledge to be strong in face of adversity, I pledge to stay. To weather all storms that come my way. I pledge to stand firm, hold my ground, bow my head if I must…to kneel, to rise again.
I pledge to fight 🐺 and to remember that I, I am a moon child.
With our deepest love,